Emotions, Arrogance and Self-loathing.

You know when you feel crap, and you dont know why you feel crap. Thats how i feel. Im typing this quickly because ashley is behind me and i dont want him reading it. I'd start typing about everything shit in my life but quite frankly no one would care. people say they care but i doubt they do. its not like anyone but emma is going to be reading this. i already know emma cares. i dont even know what im saying. im just typing meaningless random words. everything is mixed up. i dont know how i feel. i dont know why i feel like this. is it numbness perhaps? just a feeling of neither contentness nor that awful upsetting feeling. just in between. i should be glad that im not upset about anything. or that nothing is majorly wrong in my life. but im not. glad that is. i'll keep complaining about how everything is bad. i know that everything could be so much worse. people tell us that all the time when we feel upset. "just remember there are people worse off than you." but you know what. thats crap advice. now on top of all the irrational stupid feelings i feel, i get guilt. why the hell should i be worrying about my insignificant problems when other people are struggling with worse. well thats me for you. im a selfish attention seeking arrogant teenager. i probably deserve this. all this unknown pain that i hav. i probably am making it up like my family thinks. maybe im subconsciously a hypochrondriac. another one of my attention seeking ways. anyway that was alot of stupid waffle. i know that anyone who reads this will feel as if they hav just wasted 1 minute of their life.